Anyone see that dog? you know, the one that took a giant shit in my mouth last night....

So, if success is measured in the amount of painkillers required to only slightly ease the pain in my skull, than i'd say last nights official, unoffical Burlington Bloggers "social drink", was a rip-roaring success. I remember sometime around oh, 6ish thinking... ug, i think i'm getting a cold, i'm gonna take it easy tonight... then, not long after thinking to myself "Oooooh! cider jacks are only a 1$" and then, "what will go good with a cider jack? oh i know... a giant girl shot on the rocks!" (tasted like Hawaiian punch, next morning felt more like, a Samoan daterape...) after that it was yet another failed attempt to see the 300 (that's the 3rd showing i didn't get into in 24 hours.) Then dinner at Shalimar w/ T-balls (which later that night in a strange bout of the Michael J Fox's i managed to karate chop, in a fresh out of the microwave superheated condition, all over myself... and then right after that, spill JC Penny's dinner all over her... she just sort of looked at me like... "so..... you gonna clean this shit up?"
But then there was the Blogger meeting, and that was fun. The exclusive meeting quickly turned all inclusive as we ran into other friends, and their friends, and my lovely little sister Tara "Bara" and her also lovely girlfriend Sara "Bara" who were both sporting sexy 200$ designer jeans... sevens or something. I dunno... I prefer the levi's myself, they flatter my thighs.
Then we got the stupid idea to go to JP's cause of a combination of stupidity, girl crushes, and karaoke, where i watched Ben H. do probably the greatest thing that's ever been done since forever. I can't describe it actually... and actually, the greatest thing ever was watching Jenny fresh from a sexy night at the Cabaret fund raiser party, decked out in a sexy skirt, boots and a tight little corset top, blasting away at fucking Big Buck Hunter. I mean, jesus.

1. hot girl in sexy restrictive clothing.
2. cocking a orange plastic shotgun.
3. playing a video game.

... uh.

Anway, so ben gets on stage wearing black tinted wrap around sunglasses, slouching a little, with a drink in one hand and the mike in the other, and proceeds to croon (in pitch perfect, unfaultering falsetto mind you) Lovefool by the Cardigans... you know what song that is...

Love me love me
Say that you love me
Fool me fool me
Go on and fool me
Love me love me
Pretend that you love me
Leave me leave me
Just say that you need me
Love me love me
Say that you love me
Leave me leave me
Just say that you need me
I cant care bout anything but you...

yeah that one. Awesome! There are other things that happened, like me deciding that long island ice teas are suitable end of the night, last call beverages.... or the bunch of us going over to Allie's apartment and looking at fancy treehouses while ben played drunken mp3 DJ (think Jesus Jones and "the lyrical gangsta") Or Jenny helping me to cut myself off and drink some water. (thank you.) But those things aren't important, those are just details. I just wanna know who's dog that was.

Jay has a few more pictures |spitting out teeth|
(should be retitled spitting out throw up that got caught in your teeth after you threw up on a cabbie.)


Undead Molly said...

Glad you had a nice Blogger Bacchanal! I hope the cabbie took humiliating vomit pictures of you guys and posted them to his blog.

jay said...

If so, I deserve it...

Tanner, if you want photographic proof of Ben singing the Cardigans song you need to help me out--I lost my bag somewhere that night. Any chance you can check with Allie to see if I left it at her place?

My guess is I probably left it in the cab. And there's no way I'm asking them for it back...

ben said...

It was blogger meetup?! I had no idea.

Tmoore said...

ah no jay!

that sucks so bad - Jenny's gonna ask Allie for you later, and otherwise you really should call the cab company and ask them if they have the bag. call the OP too, they always hold onto bags for people... try JP's as well. That's really too bad.

jay said...

Thanks Tanner! I'll try giving the OP & JP's a ring tonight. I don't even remember what company the cab was from...

That was definitely the drunkest I've been in years. I blame the cheap pitchers at the OP.